He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
