you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize