Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I'm passing your future prison.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize