What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
