I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
