i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Terrible idea I love it
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Randomize
