I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
