R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
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