Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Randomize
