Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
