my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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