PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
