Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Randomize
