Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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