and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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