I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
