Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize