I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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