she smelled like a LAN party
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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