is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
