I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
