I think scott just propositioned me for sex
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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