I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
