dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
