1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize