Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
