I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I don't deserve a penis
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
