who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize