on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
