I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
you never un-have a 4some
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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