I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
