At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
