He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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