Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize