So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
