I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
