you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Randomize
