Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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