I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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