Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party