you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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