.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
