So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Randomize
