Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize