Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
