do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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