And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
