Grow some girl-balls and come out already
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
