the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
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