They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Randomize
