So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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