I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize